Cam takes a look back - as only he can - at our loss on the south coast.
17th May 2021
That relegation-defining nail's dangled ominously for a lifetime and Sean Dyche's Burnley drove it into Fulham's Premier League coffin, reading our last rites with a foreseeable 2-0 victory. Bowing out without a whimper, Scott Parker summarised this condemning defeat with loaded statements, dressed dismissively, holding his hand up to our demise whilst inadvertently accusing unnamed affiliates. Protests won't relieve us of Tony Khan but I genuinely hope that as our distracted, unqualified excuse of a DoF - who's presumably maturing - he'll also own a hefty, deserving slice of accountability.
11th May 2021
There was no celebratory slice of Cuthbert the Caterpillar on Scott Parker's 100th game in charge of Fulham. The Whites held their breath, Mikel Arteta's party-crashing Arsenal blew out the candles. No Premier League triumph in the capital in 23 attempts, no victory at either the Emirates or Highbury in the league, ever, and as we digest a draw that stings like another deflating defeat, we're now pondering the possibility of a null and void season, safe for another year in the top-flight, thanks to the timely, albeit despicable announcement of the European Super League.
19th April 2021
As the cameraman panned to the touchline, fixed firmly on Scott Parker's grimace, we all felt it. Shocked to the core at the sight of an oily steroid specimen blast his first goal in 16 months, as well as a late, crushing winner for Nuno Espírito Santo's Wolverhampton Wanderers, hearts sunk, hands cradled heads and even the most opinionated of fans was left utterly speechless, staring forlornly at the patterns on living room rugs.
10th April 2021
Scott Parker's "Putney River Rats" were drowned out in the closing stages by Dean Smith's resilient European contenders and with Newcastle United scrounging a last-ditch draw against Tottenham Hotspur, salvation is still marginally out of reach, shelved by a north African assailant and an England debutant at Villa Park. It all went a little wrong for the visitors, jeers soon muted cheers and on Easter Sunday, a day of sweet rejoicing and diabetes, a sour taste loitered in the mouths of Fulham's gobsmacked disciples.
5th April 2021
The better team won and that's basically all there is to it. Standing with Scott Parker's post-match presser, Fulham were vastly disappointing, discouraging and we deserved absolutely nothing from Friday evening's 2-1 defeat against Marcelo Bielsa's Leeds United. Whenever the Peacocks play, they're accompanied by a media wank fest but in SW6, as they registered their first victory in the capital in 17 attempts, the plaudits were fully merited.
21st March 2021
Fuelled by superstition, Fulham lined up against Manchester City with the ambition of withholding Pep Guardiola's runaway league leaders but, as the narrative indulgently scripted a routine 3-0 victory for the Citizens, perhaps Scott Parker will bin off that ghastly quilted overcoat of his and start afresh on Friday evening.
14th March 2021
Ordinarily, being gracious in victory is the done thing. Not you, or I, really likes a gloater but in this instance, seeing as Fulham recorded their first win at Anfield since 2013, and our 8th unbeaten away game on the bounce this season, instructing Jurgen Klopp and all the world's insufferable Kopites to kindly stick a 6th-consecutive home loss in a zoot feels so, so appropriate.
7th March 2021